


It Was Love at First Sight

by Lil_Gukkie



Series: I'll Love You Even When You're Gone [1]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Character Death, Fluff and Angst, Heavy Angst, M/M, Major Illness, Sad Ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-02
Updated: 2017-08-02
Packaged: 2018-12-10 09:53:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,505
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11689206
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lil_Gukkie/pseuds/Lil_Gukkie
Summary: "And it was love at first sight, at least on my end." He rolled his eyes."You're so cheesy.""Only for you."(Rated T+ for language)





	It Was Love at First Sight

**Author's Note:**

  * For [fromstarlighttodust](https://archiveofourown.org/users/fromstarlighttodust/gifts).



"You are not welcome here." 

I never thought those would be the words that broke my heart. 

I was always known to be the kind of person who never gave a shit what anyone else thought of me. I would push myself past the limits and fight for what I wanted. What I loved. 

It was that "fuck you all" personality that drew Eren to me. At least, that's what he told me. He said that he had looked up to me for years, always pushing himself as far as he could go in hopes to be like me. It was the most touching thing I had heard in my life, even though I didn't understand it fully back then. 

When Eren and I grew closer, he told me that he had cancer. Aggressive NK cell leukemia, specifically. His survival rate was low, and relapse was apparently inevitable. He was going through chemotherapy, but he was supposedly limited to eight months. 

And within that first month, I couldn't deny that I had fallen in love. 

I took him to his daily therapy and stayed with him through his checkups the second month. 

Month three was a huge milestone. We made it a bad habit to sneak out at night and meet up. (I say sneak out because Eren was living with his dad. I just met him at his house.) We would walk for hours in the night, always ending up at our favorite hill in the large park near his house. The trees were far enough away that we could see the sky clearly, and we would gaze quietly at the stars. The night was as clear as any other, and we were laying side by side. He started to tell me a story about his mother, who had passed away of the same cancer when he was just ten. I turned my head to him as he spoke. 

"I fell asleep next to her in the hospital bed," he said, and I could hear the strain in his voice. I was nearly positive I knew what was coming next. "When I woke up...she had passed away."

I couldn't bear to see Eren so sad. He was always smiling, always laughing at every shitty joke I made. But seeing him cry right next to me..it was heart-wrenching. I sat up, motioning for him to do the same. It took a moment, but he soon pulled himself up as well. 

I grabbed his arm and tugged him closer, wrapping my arms around him. "I know you might not want to," I started, feeling him relax into my chest, "but if you need a shoulder to cry on, I'll always be here." 

He had broken down almost immediately. My shoulder and chest grew wet with his tears as sobs shook his whole body. As much as it hurt me to feel this beautiful boy cry his heart out against me, I couldn't help but love that he trusted me so much. 

The fourth month terrified me. Eren wouldn't talk to me. He almost tried to avoid me, and I was worried that something bad had happened. When I came to visit him on the day of his weekly check up, the last week of the month, he told me he didn't want me there. So I drove him to the hospital and sat in the waiting room while he handled it alone. 

He walked out about an hour later, and was completely silent. 

I couldn't fight the tears as they spilled from my eyes. I had assumed the worst. If Eren wouldn't talk to me..didn't want me to be there, and had avoided me the entire month. His date had been moved up. 

I felt warm arms wrap around me, and we walked out of the hospital without a word. Once we were outside, Eren sat me down on a bench. 

"Levi, why are you crying?"

I looked up at him through a layer of tears, his beautiful blue-green eyes blurred by my emotions. "W-What did they say?" 

His brows furrowed as he took my hand. "They said the same as always, Levi. I'm staying strong. I might even get another month with how well I'm doing." He gave my hand a squeeze. "What, did you think I was losing?"

I was so far beyond happy and confused that I didn't know what to do. I just wrapped my arms around his neck and held him as I cried, not sure how to pull myself together. 

It took a while, but I eventually managed to clear my head a little to speak. My throat was hoarse from crying, but I didn't care. "You..avoided me this whole month. And then you didn't want me in there. I just...I thought something was wrong."

The laugh that met my ears filled me with utter joy, and I was able to fully settle down. "Levi...I am so sorry. I didn't mean to scare you like that."

"Tch..I wasn't scared." A lie.

"You were worried, then." I didn't deny it. He wrapped his arms around me and held me close. "I just..shit, I feel so bad. You haven't done anything but be there for me and make me happy, Levi. I don't want to make you feel like this. I was just...nervous, is all."

"Nervous?" I prompted, pulling my head back a little without pulling from the hug. 

"I.." he trailed off, and the redness on his cheeks was undeniably cute. "I like you. A lot. And I tend to fuck up shit when I like someone, so I was trying to find the right way to tell you." He laughed sheepishly. "Guess I still messed up, though. Sorry."

I shook my head, cupping his cheeks and waiting for him to meet my gaze. "You're a stupid little shit, you know." He laughed, and I couldn't help the small smile that grew on my lips. 

I leaned in and pressed my lips to his, and soon enough he returned the kiss. "Levi?" he questioned softly.

"Will you be my boyfriend, Eren?" The smile that broke out on his lips was nearly unbearably bright.

Month five was wonderful. The doctors gave Eren one extra month of estimated time. His cancer was so slow, they believed it would last a while. I couldn't help but want to celebrate, and I took Eren out on a dinner date. I let him get whatever he wanted, and we shared a dessert and a bottle of wine. (The kid was 22. I'm not an idiot.) 

Eren was just _slightly_ intoxicated when we left. "Leviiii~ Can I spend the night? I want to cuddle with you." The little shit was always open about his affection, and it was endearing. 

"You know your dad will be worried."

"He trusts you. I'll text him." And Eren was granted permission. Which honestly surprised me, since Grisha didn't exactly seem to like me all that much in my opinion. 

So Eren went home with me. He complimented my house a thousand times and talked about how clean it was. He even laughed and teased me a little about the fact that I nearly jumped him for forgetting to take off his shoes at the door. (I didn't want my white carpets to be stained by his muddy shoes.) I gave a small tour to show him all the rooms, and then we settled in on my bed. I was leaning back against my headboard, Eren's head on my shoulder as he snuggled into my side. I was simply stroking his hair with my eyes closed, some random show playing on the television on the other side of the room. 

It was pleasant to have him this close to me. 

And of course, the horny little shit just had to sit up and straddle me after a while. I looked at him curiously, raising one eyebrow. "Levi..can I kiss you?" he asked, his voice so soft that it almost sounded timid. 

"You haven't asked before now," I pointed out. He blushed brightly.

"N-No...I mean like..deeply. A good kiss."

I smirked, grabbing his arm and tugging him down. I pressed my lips to his, and once he started to kiss back, I tilted my head a bit. I slipped my tongue out, licking across his lower lip and feeling him part his lips as well. His hands slipped around my neck, and mine settled on his hips as he shifted closer to me. 

Needless to say, our night ended with more than a good make out session, and, of course, there were plenty more similar nights that month.

Month six was even better. As we were cuddled up together in bed, I heard three soft words fall from my boyfriend's lips. "I love you."

"I love you, too, Eren."

"I've loved you for four months now," he added.

I smiled, pressing a kiss to his head. "And I've loved you for five."

"No you haven't," he denied, sitting up with a little laugh. "We _met_ five months ago."

"And it was love at first sight, at least on my end." He rolled his eyes. 

"You're so cheesy."

"Only for you." 

He leaned in and pressed a kiss to my cheek, and I ruffled his hair a little as I watched him settle onto my chest. I readjusted the blankets over us, overjoyed that we had finally spoken those terrifying words. 

And those "I love you"'s were daily from that moment forward. 

Month seven had to be the best of them all. It was the twelfth of August, and I had taken him out on a dinner date after his check up. We were seated in a quiet area with a section of the floor cleared out. There was also a stage with a big red curtain on the back. After eating, the restaurant began to play a very special song. I stood up, smiling when he gasped. "Levi, it's our song!" he said excitedly. I nodded, walking around to his chair. 

"Our song" had become High School Musical's "Can I Have This Dance" since he was so obsessed with it, and I had danced with him while he sang it. 

"Sing it for me," I said, and he stood up, walking with me to a little cleared spot in the center of our seating area. 

He began to sing the female's lead, and I took his hand, following him as he danced. I then took the lead, singing along to the harmony of the song. I had learned it just for him, knowing he would be presently surprised when he heard it. 

As the song progressed, other people began to dance along with us, and Eren and I were separated. I snuck away with the help of some of the restaurant staff, and they led me backstage so I could get into place for my piece of the flash mob. Everything was going so smoothly.

I hooked the microphone headset around my ear and made sure it was positioned well. Now it was all on the guy running the mic not to mess it up. I let out a nervous sigh, pulling on the nice, red suit coat that I had waiting back stage. I then fixed the cuffs of my black shirt beneath, and waited for the intro to my part to come along. I couldn't deny that I was quite nervous.

And then I heard a little guitar pattern start. My four bar intro. I smiled a little, walking up to the curtain. I pushed out of the curtain, starting to sing Ed Sheeran's "Thinking Out Loud" just for him.

I walked up slowly to the chair in the center of the stage, where my beloved was seated, singing the chorus as I placed my hand on the blindfold I had asked them to put on him. (What? I was nervous, and him turning around while I sang would've made it even worse.) I removed it as I sang the last line of the chorus. "Maybe we found love right where we are."

I smiled as I pressed a kiss to Eren's forehead, and his bright laugh filled my ears. I knelt down to the ground, pulling out the small box that had been kept in my red coat, taking Eren's right hand in my left. His face was covered in tears, and I could only hope they were happy ones as I continued. 

"Eren Jaeger, you have made me the happiest man alive. I thought I would never find someone to love, but then you came along and shattered every wall I had built around my heart. I could never be more thankful that you tore me apart and put me back together. You fixed all my brokenness." I kissed his knuckles before releasing his hand, opening up the box in my hand. 

"Will you marry me?"

"Yes..oh god yes, Levi!"

~~~

"You are not welcome here."

And there I stood on month eight, staring at the back of Armin's head as he told me I was not welcome to be at my own fiancé's side as he lay dying in that damn hospital bed. 

"Fuck you. I want to see Eren."

"Levi, he-"

"I don't give a shit what he said!" I let the fearful tremor in my voice slide. "I have to see him. There is no option. Now move, or I will move you myself, dammit!" 

And Armin moved. I let out a sigh, rushing past him and into my soon-to-be husband's room. There he was, a ventilator on his face to keep him breathing. I collapsed at his side, holding his left hand in my own as I stared at the ring on his finger. 

"I-I love you," I nearly whispered, a choked sob escaping my lips as I rested my head against his hand. 

"You weren't...supposed.."

I laughed bitterly, casting a watery gaze up to his half-lidded eyes. "I c-can't just let you..go without m-me," I cried, clutching his hand tighter as I closed my eyes. 

"Levi..." The way he nearly wheezed shattered me fully, and I didn't even fight the little tug of my hand. I moved slowly into the bed, careful not to disturb any of the wires or pumps hooked up to him. He settled my head on his chest, just over his heart, and I sobbed into his chest as he wrapped his arms around me. 

I focused on his heartbeat. How it was so..so slow. So weak. So faint. I etched the sound into my brain, willing it to last forever silently in my head. 

"I love you, Levi." So quiet.

"I-I love you..you too, E-Eren," I said in a muttered whisper, small hiccups breaking the words apart. 

I listened to his heartbeat, even after his hand fell limp in my own. Even as the long beep of the monitor filled my ears.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you guys for reading! Feel free to leave a comment if you'd like!
> 
> I wanna say a special thanks to fromstarlighttodust because they are an AWESOME angst writer, and I wanted to give angst a shot ^^


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